...and I'm not!
I realize that the simple truth that I'm not God should be an indubitable fact of life, but...sometimes I act like I am.
I try to tell God what he needs to do in my life and when, how he needs to work in different situations, and essentially try to put God into a box and force him to work in my life on my terms.
Heaven help me. Thank the Lord that when I slip into that mindset, God, being the sovereign being that he is, gently or firmly (whatever the situation calls for) reminds me that he's God and I'm not.
It certainly doesn't help that I've always been a bit of a control freak. I like to know what's going on and have a grip on what's going on in my life. And as those who have known me for a decent amount of time can testify, whenever I'm put in situations that are entirely beyond my control, I don't like it at all. So often times, living a life of faith, especially when I have no idea what's around the next bend, is incredibly difficult for me. When it seems like God isn't doing anything, or isn't working fast enough to satisfy me, I have this tendency to try to take over.
I'm also a planner. I'm constantly thinking ahead to the next thing in my life, trying to prepare for it. That's actually rather amusing, because nothing ever really happens like I think it should (God, through his grace and mercy, does things so much better!). You'd think I would learn...
I could try to blame my doubt and lack of total surrender on being a control freak and say, "Well that's just the way you made me God." But that's no excuse. Following God requires total surrender--not partial surrender whenever it's most convenient for me. God calls me to trust him to work in my life. Who am I to doubt that the omnipotent, omniscient God, Creator of all things, knows exactly what I need and when I need it?
I'm also thankful for God's patience. Yesterday, I had another of several conversations with God lately that have consisted of *guilty look* a good bit of whining mixed in with other bits of conversation. And with each cry of my heart, God has gently reminded me to simply trust Him. That's much better than I would have done at this point. I think that by now, if I was God and I was having to deal with someone like me, I would have hit him or her over the head with something hard and yelled, "Would you just shut up and trust me!"
Now that's not to say that I don't need to be put in my place from time to time--and God has done that when I've needed it. Usually a Job-style "where were you when I created the earth?" type of reminder works quite well. ;)
But yesterday I was glad that instead of a firm reminder that God is sovereign and I'm nothing, God chose to speak to me with gentle, comforting reminders to simply trust Him--even when having faith in Him seems totally irrational. He knew that's what I needed.
I needed to hear his whispered reassurances of love and promises of faithfulness as I rested in his embrace.
I'm glad that God is God and that he knows far better than I how to write the story of my life.
Showing posts with label surrender. Show all posts
Showing posts with label surrender. Show all posts
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Surrender
Surrender.
The word itself sounds simple enough. Yet its meaning packs a powerful punch.
According to the American Heritage College Dictionary, surrender means:
Verb:
1) To relinquish possession or control of to another because of demand or
compulsion
2) To give up in favor of another
3) To give up or give back (something granted)
4) To give up or abandon
5) To give over or resign (oneself) to something, as to an emotion
6) Law To restore (an estate, for example), especially to give up (a lease)
before expiration of the term
Not an easy task.
As a follower of Christ, surrender must not simply be part of my vocabulary, it should be an active part of my life. My life is not my own, it was bought at a price (1 Corinthians 6: 19-20). My daily activities should reflect that.
In the above definitions, the act of surrender is a one time deal. For example, if two armies are fighting in a war and one surrenders, the war is over. Finished. The general of the surrendering army does not have to come back the next day and say, “Hey, we surrender again.”
However, for the Christian, surrender is not just a one-time experience. It must be a daily thing. So often, as Christians, we fall into the trap of living in past events. Sure, one may have surrendered every particle of his or her life—all their hopes and dreams, everything—to God years ago at church camp or at a church meeting, but does that still play an active role in his or her life today? Yes and no. Yes, it was a valid experience with God and one can wholeheartedly surrender everything to Him in that moment, and I’m not discounting that in any way. Been there, done that. But how many times since that moment have I re-seized control of my life? And how many new dreams and desires do I have that need to be surrendered? Or what about something as deceptively simple as the agenda I have for my day? The answer is yes, I have plenty of new dreams, plans and agendas to surrender, and unfortunately, I have taken back control of my life countless times, more than I care to remember. Surrender is not a one-time event.
Daily surrender is definitely Biblical. It is a form of dying to self. And this isn’t just about dying to the hopes and dreams we hold closely in our hearts. What about our time? Are we willing to surrender our day to the Lord and let him structure it for us? Heaven forbid we have to be inconvenienced and set aside some of our plans for the day because God has something else in mind. And what about dying to the fear of man and being a bold witness for Christ? Often, that can factor into our time as well. Are we willing to stop in the midst of what we’re doing to share the truth with someone, regardless of where we are and who might be listening/watching?
Jesus discusses this in Luke when he says:
I also liked the way these verses are worded in the Message translation:
In the same way that one should make sure his or her spiritual armor is in place or be filled afresh with the Holy Spirit, one has to die to self and surrender to God on a daily basis.
Paul urges us in Romans to offer ourselves as “living sacrifices” to God:
Once again, I love the Message translation as well:
This also brings up a good point. It takes God’s help for us to completely surrender to him. We have to make a conscious decision to do it—but God meets us at that place. When we humble ourselves and let him take control, he gladly helps us to follow his lead. God wants all of us, every day.
The many synonyms for “surrender” listed on thesaurus.com also raise some interesting points. Some of the synonyms include: abandon, comply, resign, concede, relinquish, submit, vacate, waive, yield, abdicate, give over, give up, lay down. Almost all of these involve, to some extent, the giving up of one’s rights, which is exactly what God wants from us. When we surrender our lives to him—at salvation and every day—we are declaring that we have given up our rights to live our own lives. Yes, we certainly have rights as sons and daughters of God—but we relinquish our “right” to control our own lives and live them for ourselves.
I am preaching this to myself probably more than anyone else who might read this. God has really been working with me on this over the past week and a half, thus the inspiration to write. ;) He started the process by asking me to let go of the tight hold I had on the hopes and dreams buried deep inside my heart, and then challenged me to be willing to surrender my time and reputation—everything—for Him, every day. God has also really been stretching me in the area of waiting for Him. Just because he plants desires in my heart and gives me a tiny glimpse of what He has planned for the future, does not mean that the future is now. And I can’t—and shouldn’t try to—box God in and try to tell Him how He needs to work in my life.
I can be a bit of a control freak at times, so this is often difficult for me (and I’m not using my personality as an excuse—far from it). I have often found myself .tricked into believing I am completely surrendered to Christ, only to find myself clinging tightly to small areas of my heart that I don’t want to relinquish control over. Typically, the control is motivated by fear. I’m afraid of what might happen if I release control. In reality, that’s ridiculous. Even in my short twenty-one years on this earth, I’ve already learned time and time again that God definitely knows better than I do how to run my life. Left on my own, I only mess things up. But God, in his grace, can take my messed-up life and do something beautiful with it, in it, and through it.
God has particularly been working with me on the day-to-day act of surrender. I’ve discovered that daily surrender is a very conscious decision. At least in my own life, it simply hasn’t been enough to just say that I’m surrendered to God and not deliberately re-surrender myself to him everyday. If I don’t, I find myself unconsciously taking back control. So for the past week and a half, each day has involved an act of surrender. Goodness knows I don’t have it down yet, but with God’s help, I’m working on it. And I’ve found that although surrendering is a difficult and often scary process, the rewards far outweigh the pain. I’m never as at peace as I am when I’m surrendered to God. I want my life to be fully surrendered to Him at all times and in every way.
The word itself sounds simple enough. Yet its meaning packs a powerful punch.
According to the American Heritage College Dictionary, surrender means:
Verb:
1) To relinquish possession or control of to another because of demand or
compulsion
2) To give up in favor of another
3) To give up or give back (something granted)
4) To give up or abandon
5) To give over or resign (oneself) to something, as to an emotion
6) Law To restore (an estate, for example), especially to give up (a lease)
before expiration of the term
Not an easy task.
As a follower of Christ, surrender must not simply be part of my vocabulary, it should be an active part of my life. My life is not my own, it was bought at a price (1 Corinthians 6: 19-20). My daily activities should reflect that.
In the above definitions, the act of surrender is a one time deal. For example, if two armies are fighting in a war and one surrenders, the war is over. Finished. The general of the surrendering army does not have to come back the next day and say, “Hey, we surrender again.”
However, for the Christian, surrender is not just a one-time experience. It must be a daily thing. So often, as Christians, we fall into the trap of living in past events. Sure, one may have surrendered every particle of his or her life—all their hopes and dreams, everything—to God years ago at church camp or at a church meeting, but does that still play an active role in his or her life today? Yes and no. Yes, it was a valid experience with God and one can wholeheartedly surrender everything to Him in that moment, and I’m not discounting that in any way. Been there, done that. But how many times since that moment have I re-seized control of my life? And how many new dreams and desires do I have that need to be surrendered? Or what about something as deceptively simple as the agenda I have for my day? The answer is yes, I have plenty of new dreams, plans and agendas to surrender, and unfortunately, I have taken back control of my life countless times, more than I care to remember. Surrender is not a one-time event.
Daily surrender is definitely Biblical. It is a form of dying to self. And this isn’t just about dying to the hopes and dreams we hold closely in our hearts. What about our time? Are we willing to surrender our day to the Lord and let him structure it for us? Heaven forbid we have to be inconvenienced and set aside some of our plans for the day because God has something else in mind. And what about dying to the fear of man and being a bold witness for Christ? Often, that can factor into our time as well. Are we willing to stop in the midst of what we’re doing to share the truth with someone, regardless of where we are and who might be listening/watching?
Jesus discusses this in Luke when he says:
Then he said to them all: ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.
- Luke 9:23-24 NIV
I also liked the way these verses are worded in the Message translation:
Then he told them what they could expect for themselves: ‘Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat—I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What good would it do to get everything you want and lose you, the real you?
In the same way that one should make sure his or her spiritual armor is in place or be filled afresh with the Holy Spirit, one has to die to self and surrender to God on a daily basis.
Paul urges us in Romans to offer ourselves as “living sacrifices” to God:
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.
- Romans 12:1
Once again, I love the Message translation as well:
So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him.
This also brings up a good point. It takes God’s help for us to completely surrender to him. We have to make a conscious decision to do it—but God meets us at that place. When we humble ourselves and let him take control, he gladly helps us to follow his lead. God wants all of us, every day.
The many synonyms for “surrender” listed on thesaurus.com also raise some interesting points. Some of the synonyms include: abandon, comply, resign, concede, relinquish, submit, vacate, waive, yield, abdicate, give over, give up, lay down. Almost all of these involve, to some extent, the giving up of one’s rights, which is exactly what God wants from us. When we surrender our lives to him—at salvation and every day—we are declaring that we have given up our rights to live our own lives. Yes, we certainly have rights as sons and daughters of God—but we relinquish our “right” to control our own lives and live them for ourselves.
I am preaching this to myself probably more than anyone else who might read this. God has really been working with me on this over the past week and a half, thus the inspiration to write. ;) He started the process by asking me to let go of the tight hold I had on the hopes and dreams buried deep inside my heart, and then challenged me to be willing to surrender my time and reputation—everything—for Him, every day. God has also really been stretching me in the area of waiting for Him. Just because he plants desires in my heart and gives me a tiny glimpse of what He has planned for the future, does not mean that the future is now. And I can’t—and shouldn’t try to—box God in and try to tell Him how He needs to work in my life.
I can be a bit of a control freak at times, so this is often difficult for me (and I’m not using my personality as an excuse—far from it). I have often found myself .tricked into believing I am completely surrendered to Christ, only to find myself clinging tightly to small areas of my heart that I don’t want to relinquish control over. Typically, the control is motivated by fear. I’m afraid of what might happen if I release control. In reality, that’s ridiculous. Even in my short twenty-one years on this earth, I’ve already learned time and time again that God definitely knows better than I do how to run my life. Left on my own, I only mess things up. But God, in his grace, can take my messed-up life and do something beautiful with it, in it, and through it.
God has particularly been working with me on the day-to-day act of surrender. I’ve discovered that daily surrender is a very conscious decision. At least in my own life, it simply hasn’t been enough to just say that I’m surrendered to God and not deliberately re-surrender myself to him everyday. If I don’t, I find myself unconsciously taking back control. So for the past week and a half, each day has involved an act of surrender. Goodness knows I don’t have it down yet, but with God’s help, I’m working on it. And I’ve found that although surrendering is a difficult and often scary process, the rewards far outweigh the pain. I’m never as at peace as I am when I’m surrendered to God. I want my life to be fully surrendered to Him at all times and in every way.
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